Murder at 3M

So last night was game night. We (Eric, Javi, and I) met up at Chili’s for dinner. Then Eric and I went skating. Javi wussed out on us. Apparently he once fell while skating and he’s been traumatized ever since. I told him that even Madonna got back on the horse after her injury, but he wasn’t having any of that. Michelle was supposed to go with us too, but she decided to stay home. I told them she was sick. I don’t think that was really why she didn’t show up, but it sounded good to me.

Skating was so much fun! It was Adult Skate night, so there were no children. That makes a huge difference! Granted, some of those adults act like kids. The worst thing about the kids is that they fly by you with no concern for safety. There were a few adults there last night doing the same thing. COME ON! This isn’t roller derby! Eric and I were having a good time watching people and skating. Poor Eric though, he doesn’t have skate skills yet. He needs lots of practice!

Ok… there’s this new woman at work. Her name is Shandell. She started about two months ago. When she started they gave her a big plant as a welcome gift. She put the plant on a file cabinet on the edge of her cube, it faces the hallway. I have to pass this plant every morning on the way to my desk. I’ve been watching it slowly dying week after week. Worse yet, she won’t prune it. It has all of these sickly yellow leaves on it.

A fellow coworker and I have been concerned for it’s health these past few days. I took it upon myself to prune her plant little by little when I walk by in the morning. I can’t do too much because I don’t want anyone to see me, but I have managed to pull out all the dead and yellow leaves. Today that coworker and I were talking about staging an intervention. Someone has got to rescue this plant before she completely kills it.

So I printed out a sign that says, “HELP ME! She’s murdering me… one leaf at a time!” I snuck up to her cube and I put it on the pot her plant is in. She was in her cube at the time so I had to be extra sneaky. Mission Accomplished. I really hope she has a sense of humor… but more importantly I hope she takes this as sign that plant murder will not be tolerated at 3M.

*Edited to add: I felt bad about the sign and went to remove it, but she had already seen it. She thought it was funny and thinks her cube neighbor did it. I printed up a new sign using a ransom note generator from the web. It says, “RANSOM! Give me light, water and lots of love or one leaf dies every day!”

I don’t think anyone other than the few people I told, has any idea it was me. The note has been up there for two days now.